Categories
Uncategorized

What is the meaning of life? Morning Thoughts

I dive into my mind sometimes,

What’s the meaning of life?

^there are levels to the answer of this question

Because in a large way, we are literally creating the meaning of life.

-but yes, on a metaphysical, quantum level, there is a lottttttt happening. Layers. Levels. Dimensions. Etc. & there’s multiple layers within the layers — but this is what we do, right? As humans. We’re explorers. Pioneers. Renegades. & to go deeper, within the human mind – and also externally, we must begin “digging” you could say — diving into the mind – for me, I’m a natural philosopher, & psychedelics like psilocybin & lsd a handful of times(I would like to do more) – they can serve as mind “digging” tools — 

^^and one of the many things I’ve discovered/experienced, is that “Mind” is possibly everywhere. It’s not only within the individual. During some of my psychedelic trips I have understood this completely, wholly. It’s far-out. Definitely. But it’s real. & if I need to, I’m sure I could find quotes from geniuses of the past – scientific & other, who have said the same thing — but now, as we are advancing – in technology, etc, we may be able to prove this to be true.

^this is so obvious to me, that sometimes I feel like humanity already knows this…but, at so many levels it’s also obvious that humanity doesn’t know this — as a species, humanity overall, is still mostly behaving like animals, savages. 

& this ^^ is understandable. Look where we came from – as a species (humanity). “Life”, as we know it – well, the history of humanity, has been savagery. So it’s like yea, of course. 

But then where do we go from here?

& how? 

& why?

& I don’t know if it even matters. 

But I guess maybe it’s also our instinct which makes us want to strive & survive, & learn, & evolve.

(I drink a lot of water. I drink a lot of other things too. But lots and lots of water.)

As humans, we like to think we are in control. & to an extent, we are. But to a very small extent — because there are metaphysical, invisible, quantum, all that shit – is here. And it always has been. Life goes way way way beyond the human experience. Life is not about us. It’s not. Get over it. Boo-hoo. Cry me a river — & then use that water to help people.

Humanity, well, humans, individually, are selfish. Almost completely selfish.

It’s their instinct, mostly. So their instinct, and I’m sure this is not only biological, but there are multiple factors that influence this,, but yea, most, if not all, humans instinct is to survive, and, as we look at the history of humanity, it’s easy to see this. I mean even life today. It’s obvious.

So, there must be some good to this ^^, although it may be hard to believe. But there is. like we need this(ego) to a certain extent. But there is more to life than the human ego. So much more. 

But it’s very easy to be carried away by ego.

Possibly if it weren’t for my psilocybin experiences, I may not have ever experienced life outside the human ego. But there is life beyond the human ego. And it’s beautiful. Seriously. 

But yes, there is possibly a need for balance. Of ego, and we’ll say soul, if we are to adapt & evolve, together. There’s just so much more. But for so long humans have lived inside a bubble in a way. We could call it the bubble of ego. 100%. 

There is more to life than our little ego bubbles. So so so so much more.

Water break.

Goosebumps.

Anyway. Trying to find the right words for this — for what the answer for this could be — & it’s probably many things — one being a new form of understanding,, a new way of thinking,, perceiving,, etc..

& yes, I know at least part of the way, and part of me believes that the only way to achieve this is for us, on individual levels, to live the way. 

^^and the way — well first, it’s not just one exact way – it’s not. There’s no such thing as “perfection” – well, there is, because everything is perfect already,, but in a human sense – things will never be perfect, ever. Let’s not try to make things perfect, lets just progress. Start where we are and go from here. 

^but yea, the way..I could put it simply but it’s funny because I don’t know if people would understand. So possibly it’s something I’d have to write out or something, in detail, being diligent & specific with my words – as I’m trying to do now, but this is just a free-write. My mind is speaking.

How could I plan everything that has happened? Someone couldn’t plan that out. I trust life. It’s a different form of thinking, of living, of being. 

And..I could continue with this – with writing & whatever, but, and I will, at some point. 

And yea, it’d be nice to not be living in poverty. & some might mention ego now – but like I said, we need ego to an extent. & I like to have fun. Life isn’t about just human shit. That’s stupid. About whatever. It’s so much more. And I want to create great work, and have fun while I do it, at a place where I can research & write, and feel free to dive into the Mind, & try to find the right words — to share new ways of thinking, perceiving, understanding.

Somewhere near nature, beach would be cool. No nearby neighbors haha, but I’ll still be social every now & then. 

((People are so stupid sometimes. They will take your words & twist them into their own interpretation, for better or worse, and often, for worse. So fucking stupid.)) – but again, even though this irritates me sometimes, I understand it. We, humanity, come from savagery – this is how it has been, and this is how it still is.

& I don’t mind living in poverty. Honestly I love my life, and that won’t change. It won’t. I know what I’m here for. & if I die or someone kills me, that’s okay. Seriously, whatever. It doesn’t matter. Life goes on. It’s not about me. And it’s not about you. It’s definitely not about humanity.  There’s just a lot, a lot, a lot happening on the metaphysical, quantum level, & other levels we are currently unaware of.

That’s it for now.

Categories
Psilocybin Stories

Psilocybin Can Lead You To Water

Categories
Psilocybin Stories

Spontaneous Solo Psilocybin Trip

I didn’t plan on taking the mushrooms that night. I fell asleep around 9pm and woke up around midnight. I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to take the mushrooms I had, nearly 3.5 grams.

I began with 1 gram, and started feeling the effects after 30-40 minutes. I then took another gram, and then 30 minutes after that I finished it off.

At that point I was feeling pretty great. I was in a state of trust. It was now 1:30am or so, and I was just tripping in my room.

I got on instagram & checked out some psychedelic art photos(and posted them to my story haha). The colors were vibrant. Good vibes for sure.

Then there was a video of a couple whales swimming in the sky, which I thought was fucking awesome. I watched it and it led me to wondering about whales and how they communicate, and that we as humans aren’t the center of the Universe — that we aren’t even the center of this Earth.

Then I went back to looking at psychedelic art, which inspired me to listen to music. I turned on Xavier Rudd. I love his music, especially when I’m tripping. Then I saw a trippy video which make me think of Octopuses and how they communicate. I know that Octopuses are super smart, I wondered what their world is like, and thought about how cool it’d be to communicate with an Octopus.

Then I thought about how Octopuses or other sea animals could be aliens, truly. Haha. It’s possible, but not definite. Just a thought.

Then I looked in the mirror and took some pictures of myself. My pupils were huge! Haha, my eyes were pretty much all black.

At one point in the night I turned off all the lights and laid in darkness for 30 minutes or so, opening and closing my eyes. It was so dark that it didn’t matter whether my eyes were open or closed, all I could see was darkness. I then waved my arms in front of my eyes, it was cool because I couldn’t see my arms at all, even with my eyes open, but I was moving them right in front of my face.

Laying in the darkness also reminded me that I want to get one of those trippy psychedelic light things. Then sometime later I got up and turned one light on. Yea, just one haha.

It may have been around this time, 2-3 hours into the trip, standing in the lit area, where I had a sort of out of body experience. I didn’t feel like “me” in this moment. I felt like I was outside of myself, watching myself, and it felt like that was who my true self is.

Some thoughts of life, death, &humanity went through my mind as well, and the fleetingness of it all sank in. It didn’t bother me though, it was just like a “oh, yea. That’s what this is.” And then I had thoughts about how life will solve itself, even though we humans go around trying to figure it out. I had the thought that we don’t need to do anything, and life will be okay, and that’s true, but since we’re here, we might as well do something. 

And I had the thought that we are all life, whole, one. But we often forget that. It really sank in that yes, life will figure itself out, and that we are life, so we can help ourselves figure ourself out, because it’s going to happen anyway. We’re all one. We are life. Everything is okay.

The idea that life is communicating with us sank in, and again, that life is us…

But yea that it’s always communicating in one way or another. It communicates in symbols.

I thought about how future human societies will most likely be vegan, if we make it that far.

I took pages of notes. On one page I wrote:

“Love=No fear-an absence of fear
= No judgement-an absence of judgement

This can all come down to “No-self” = an absence of self.”

(^I can dive into all this another time, or message me if you want to talk about this stuff)

But yea I thought more about my individual death, the death of me, and what that means. It seems we have a striving to live, but we don’t live forever. It’s hard to fathom living life in a different form whether it’s in the form of another person, animal, or environment, but I think that’s what happens when we die. The individual is gone, but the whole is always here. & that’s who we are, the whole.

Another note I took:

“In The End
it all works out.
So breathe,
don’t worry,
Do what you Love.”

I love many things, especially tripping & experiencing life. No one is completely perfect, but I hope some of what I do helps you and all who read this & takes part in Psilocybin Stories.

Which while tripping I did think of the PsilocybinStories instagram page and decided I want to make it more Nature-like, green vibes, water flowing, mushrooms growing, a growing community, which won’t be perfect as I struggle with trying to make things perfect, but it’s making progress, as we all are in some way.

Speaking of progress, I’d love to do this full-time – be a Psychedelic Investigator, experiencing and researching in the realms of the psychedelic experience.

You can help me do this with a donation, and as a gift I’ll send you my phone notes, about 1,700 words of notes taken during an up&down/heaven&hell kind of trip.

Donate here via PayPal, which also accepts credit & debit cards.

Thank you so much. I look forward to hearing from you and sharing more Psilocybin Stories.